EP 14: Happy National Siblings Day!

In honor of National Siblings Day, we invite some of our siblings to join us on the podcast. We'd like to introduce you to Malori, Taylor's sister; Cristina, Amanda's sister; and Anthony, Justine's brother. We share our favorite or, depending how you look at it, embarrassing stories; good and bad qualities; and reflect on our relationships with them. What type of relationship do you have with your sibling? Are you really close, very distant or somewhere in the middle?  What type of relationship would you like to have in the future?  

Apologies in advanced for the poor sound quality in this episode. Technology was not on our side! 

Transcript

Amanda: [00:00:00] Hey, y'all welcome to United AF, as friends, podcast. 

Justine: [00:00:05] A show where we try to unravel the complexities of our multi-cultural friendship and existing as millennials in today's world. 

Taylor: [00:00:12] Every other week, we'll gather together for a deep dive into how our friendship has survived and have some laughs while doing it.

Amanda: [00:00:18] We're your hosts, Amanda 

Justine: [00:00:19] Justine 

Taylor: [00:00:20] and Taylor.

Justine: [00:00:23] Well we are happy to have a bunch of special guests here today because we are celebrating National Sibling's Day. 

Anthony: [00:00:31] Wait, you started really?

 Justine: [00:00:40] Yes. So we've invited some of our siblings to join us for this lovely episode and we'll go around and you can introduce your sibling and, or they can introduce themselves, but we'll start off with Amanda. Who did you decide to bring? 

Amanda: [00:00:54] I brought my younger sister, Christina. We are three children. So I have an older brother as well, he's difficult to get a hold of. So Christina, tell them about, come on.

Christina: [00:01:05] I am 28. And I don't know, I had a brain fart and I have a five-year-old daughter named Charlotte. She is the light of my life. I work for an OB GYN in Hoboken. I'm a medical assistant and yeah, that's pretty much it. 

Justine: [00:01:27] Great, wonderful. Welcome. 

Taylor: [00:01:29] Snaps up for the sister. 

Justine: [00:01:30] And then I brought, of course my brother, because he's the only other sibling that I have. So there's Anthony.

Anthony: [00:01:38] We can make it, if we try just the… hi I'm Anthony. I'm I think I'm 29. I don't really count. And yeah, I was doing RV delivery before the pandemic. Now I'm just working at a Smashburger nearby.  

Taylor: [00:01:53] This snaps up to the brother.

Justine: [00:01:55] Yes. And then Taylor, who did you bring? 

Taylor: [00:01:58] Oh, who did I bring? This is Malori. That's my sister.  We are a match set of two, but we're also two out of five at the same time. So she's my older sister and we also have two older brothers and a younger sibling. Malori. Tell them about yourself. 

Malori: [00:02:17] Hi everybody. I'm Mal I'm nine years old. I'm on the respiratory therapist. and Taylor is younger in age, but definitely more mature.

Taylor: [00:02:32] We're not supposed to tell people that we're supposed to make you look better with this. Alright?

Justine: [00:02:38] Alrighty. Yay. Great. For the introductions, let's start off with, what is your favorite memory or story of your sibling? 

Malori: [00:02:47] There are two stories, really. One, she was in high school. I have gone to every soccer game and I mean, this game, she was so on point. I mean, she was just like stopping everything that was shot at her. She was like knocking people out. She was just good. Just a beast in the goal and I was so excited to see that. So I really enjoyed that one. And then I think the other one was at 21st birthday. It was just like, everything fun.   Being able to be there and be a part of that and just like really see her be able to just kind of get loose was just like fabulous. I mean, we still laugh to this day about things that, that happened at the party. And I mean, it was literally like what? 12 hours long?

Justine: [00:03:30] I enjoyed it.   

Amanda: [00:03:34] I was sick. 

Taylor: [00:03:38] You had the swine flu

Justine: [00:03:43] I had my eyes closed majority of the time, just because I didn't want to see any strippers.

Taylor: [00:03:53] But yes, I do have to say that night was fun because Alison, interviewing the stripper was the greatest part to that for me. 

Justine: [00:04:03] She was interviewing him while she was getting the lap dance.

Taylor: [00:04:09] She had his whole life story, by the end of it. It's hilarious. Oh my God, if I could remember, it was like, he's going to school to be a, was he's in law school or something like that? It was like, he was legit, something really smart. We were like very white collar. We were like, Alison, why did you ask these questions? She goes, I mean, he has to work. You got to figure out, make it worth his time.

Anthony: [00:04:36] That's the guy that went, fuck it. I'll be a stripper. That's that guy. 

Taylor: [00:04:41] Hey, making quick cash. 

Justine: [00:04:43] Also on it, pay off your, your tuition is probably the best way to do that, to get a lot of money. Thanks for those stories, Mal. 

Malori: [00:04:50] Oh, no problem.

Taylor: [00:04:51] Christina. 

Christina: [00:04:51] Okay. Alright. Let's see. So I have a few, so definitely one of the favorite childhood things that we would do is play like ‘Nancy Drew’ on an old desktop computer. We would sit for hours, just play a whole bunch of ‘Nancy Drew,’ her, my brother and myself. And it was like really fun. That was like one of the one times we all got along when we were younger.  When me and my sister to Broadway every year, besides this past year, my mom always gets us Broadway show tickets. And we'll go together to the city and we'll just kind of make a day of it and just watch a really awesome show. Eat some dirty hot dogs. That's pretty fun. 

Justine: [00:05:30] That's nice. Which is your favorite show that you've seen thus far? 

Christina: [00:05:34] Definitely 'Beetle Juice' only because it was like more adult-like instead of the children's side aspect, I guess of it. 

Amanda: [00:05:41] Yeah. I was going to say the same thing, actually, that one was so much fun. Plus, Catherine O'Hare made a slight appearance, which was hella cool. 

Christina: [00:05:48] Oh yeah, she did at the end. 

Justine: [00:05:50] Nice.

Christina: [00:05:51] Wait, wasn't it? Wait, Mal came with us, right? So 'Beetle Juice'. No, no Taylor. Yes, we did. Yes. The NJ PAC one, right? Yeah. 

Amanda: [00:06:07] That was when you and Mal actually slightly bonded over fairy day, asked me.

Taylor: [00:06:17] Yes, God, I forgot about that. 

Amanda: [00:06:19] I can only really think about the few times where we wouldn't get along. And there was something so most of the time she would have the remote and I wanted it. She had this stuffed animal was her favorite stuffed animal. It was a creepy looking bear thing. She called it

Christina: [00:06:33] His name was Friend. 

Amanda: [00:06:35] Yes. I would hold it hostage so I could get the remote. Most of the time it'd be just like, hiding it where she couldn't find it. So that way, if she wanted him back, she better give me that damn remote. Yeah, that was really the only thing I can think of to be perfectly honest.

Christina: [00:06:55] Yeah. I had a lot of mean stories about her too, but I didn't want to put her on the spot like that. So 

Taylor: [00:07:01] Feel free.

Justine: [00:07:04] Okay. I'll share one. One of my favorite memories is when we were younger, I want to say, I don't know if I have the age correct, but I feel like I was seven and maybe A, you were like six and we would go to these family parties and me and my childhood best friend would perform some Spice Girls. It evolved from Spice Girls music to then Backstreet Boys and then to NSYNC.  And so, we would perform these songs and dance to them. And then afterwards, my brother would sing do his little thing and we would be his backup dancers. One of them was Mmm Bop (by Hanson). And so, he was like, he just rocking back and forth Ooh. So yeah, that's probably one of my favorite memories. Cause there was funny to me. 

Anthony: [00:07:48] Because now you can just make fun of me what it is. 

Justine: [00:07:51] I don't share that story very often, by the way. That's the first time I've shared that. I don't think I've told that to Taylor or Amanda, so yeah.

Taylor: [00:08:00] We would have remembered.

Justine: [00:08:02] So there you go. Now I can share it with everybody. 

Anthony: [00:08:05] So when I was thinking, when a guy sent me the outline, I came up with two stories. I think one was when we were in the Philippines and we were out in the boondocks in the beach, in one of the provinces and Justine got stung by a jellyfish and I was like, alright, you have two options. Either I'm going to pee on it or we're going to go back to the house and get some vinegar. So I was like, and she's “Oh, but it's really itchy.” And I was like I took two options: either I'm going to pee on it or we're going back. So she chose the vinegar, the whole time she was rubbing vinegar on her leg. So that was the ones that's the one fondest memory. 

The second one is when I was leaving for the Marines, I was like who's going to take me to go to the Marines so I don't cry and stuff. And I was like mom's going to be crying the whole frigging time, Renee is going to be crying the whole time. My friends are going to be crying the whole time. Oh my sister, because we have no emotional connection. So we're just going to, I'm going to be dropped off.  I'm going to say bye Ate then we're good. So it kind of speaks volumes to like how our relationship was before, because we weren’t super close, but now we are. Yeah, so I chose her to drop me off and it was like, like me, I'm just sitting in the car next to her, God this fucking bitch. I'm just try to hold back tears. And I fucking hate her so much, but I'm going to be fine. So I don't show up to the Marines, crying my eyes out like a little girl. Oh yeah. I tell that story all the time and my friends, they think it's hilarious. And then my last story that I thought of was, my fondest memory is when we’d watch TV and then we watched ‘Phantom of the Opera’ and then we would sing along the whole friggin’ time, just sitting on the couch on a Saturday, just watching ‘Phantom of the Opera.’ At the time she was obsessed with ‘Phantom of the Opera.’ She'd watched that movie like three fucking times a day. 

Justine: [00:10:00] But also how can you not sing along to them? 

Anthony: [00:10:03] Yeah, that kind of left me at a good spot for ‘Phantom of the Opera’ because I know pretty much the whole thing yep. Fond memory. 

Justine: [00:10:13] I don't remember that but thank you for sharing that one. 

Anthony: [00:10:15] You don't remember sitting on the couch, singing on the fucking the whole time you just lay, you would just lay it out.

Justine: [00:10:28] I feel like you can hit that note better than I can. 

Anthony: [00:10:30] No. Yeah, I can't do that.   

Taylor: [00:10:31] One of my favorite memories, Malori with you is our first Comic Con the together, because one, it was the first time that we got to be really nerdy together. Because prior to that, I don't think the two of us knew how nerdy the other one was. Mal has always been a gamer, that type of thing. Like we play video games together, but the level of nerdiness and geekery, we had not seen until we walked in and we were literal kids in a candy store with just Xbox, PlayStation, ‘Dr. Who,’ ‘Star Wars,’ ‘Harry Potter,’ ‘Lord of the Rings,’ like all different manga and anime. We were like, okay, where do we go? And on this time, ‘Game of Thrones’ had just started and we were like, okay, Jason Mamoa is going to be here and we have to meet him. So we went into line to get autographs with them and there was only one other guy in line. And we were like, what in the world is this?  Then we step up and we're up together and we're like, hi, . And then I turned to my left and Malori's face is just gobsmacked. Like I just looked, I played upside down face from ‘Family Guy’ get your shit together. And you say hi, cause we are never going to meet him. And she was just like hi, I'm Malori.  I was like, Oh my God. She's always well put together. And in that moment, I was like, I don't even know who you are. Just hurry up and get his autograph let's go because you're embarrassing me. And then she got it together. Eventually got a handshake. Talk to him about the ring he was wearing, and we walked away with a wonderful memory.

Justine: [00:12:11] Do you read that a little bit differently? 

Malori: [00:12:16] Nope. I have pretty much remembered just that. I think the one part though was when he was like, hi, what's your name? I just open my mouth. I was like, eh, and that's what he told me to get my shit together and my God.

Taylor: [00:12:31] In her defense, he was in overalls with no shirts 

Justine: [00:12:34] Oh 

Taylor: [00:12:35] Yeah. 

Amanda: [00:12:36] Okay. Okay. 

Taylor: [00:12:38] Yeah. 

Amanda: [00:12:39] Fair enough. 

Justine: [00:12:39] And you need to like, add that into the story before shit goes downhill. 

Anthony: [00:12:46] Was he one strapping it or. 

Malori: [00:12:48] Yes. Yes.

Justine: [00:12:54] You had to add that into your story.

Taylor: [00:12:58] In the back of my head. I wasn't thinking about that part, but yeah, he did one strap it. Hey, look, I had my shit together. 

Justine: [00:13:09] So since we shared all those very nice favorite memories, we'll continue on the nice wagon. So what is one of your siblings best qualities. 

Christina: [00:13:22] She's very, she's super smart. Whenever I have any problem or something like, she's really great to talk to. She knows a lot about, whenever I have questions in regards to Oh, like my HR department and how they're kind of like dumb.  I just ask her and she's Oh, well, X, Y, and Z, her and my mom will just have conversations in the kitchen. Let's see. She also lets me buy things on Amazon. Yeah. Movies. She lets me use all her accounts for free. That's definitely amazing. She's a great godmother to Charlotte. I'm definitely grateful for that. If ever I need anything for her, she's always more than willing to buy it. So that's also great. 

Amanda: [00:13:56] I would say her best quality is that she is. Not selfish, I guess what selfless like me I'm hella selfish. Right? We all know this as evidence earlier today when I took care of myself before helping her. But no, she has that quality where, she'll take care of people.  That's just not me at all. 

Christina: [00:14:18] That is why am I am in the health field. 

Amanda: [00:14:22] Like it's the running, not running joke because it's probably going to actually happen where, when my parents get old, she'll be the ones to take care of them. I'll just support financially. I'm not willing to wipe people's asses. It's not happening. She'll do that.  That is definitely my favorite quality of hers. 

Christina: [00:14:37] That was really nice. Thank you. I thought you were going to say that I'm really funny cause I am

Malori: [00:14:51] I guess I'll go next for Taylor. There's definitely a couple of different things. She's definitely very caring selfless, always willing to help out. And I think my favorite part of her is her sarcasm because she's just got this dry sarcasm and she just says stuff to me. And the way she says it, I believe it. And she'll let me go with it for a good 10, 20 minutes. And then she'd be like, you do realize that I had no idea what I was talking about or, it was just. Telling you the wrong thing to see what you did just especially during these times has just gotten us through so much. And I mean, it's great. It's just fun. And she keeps me on my toes, and I guess that's why I get to be a kid.

Justine: [00:15:38] I have to say though, sometimes Taylor's sarcasm is just so strong, I guess, because sometimes I'm like, I can't tell if you're being sarcastic or if you're being serious. 

Amanda: [00:15:48] Same. Same. 

Justine: [00:15:50] Always have to clarify with her. 

Taylor: [00:15:54] Yes. And I always give you guys honest answers. So Malori is a gentle soul and what I think her best quality is that she's happy, all the time. And I don't realize how much I need that until we have days where we don't see each other. I mean, it used to happen a lot more often when she was working the night shift and I was working a day shift and we would never see each other for until we got to Saturdays and be like, Oh, hi, this is what you look like.  She's always there for it's like everybody can use a Mal in their life and I'm very grateful to have her. For that reason, I'll keep you. 

Justine: [00:16:32] That's so nice. To be honest, I feel like there's so much love in here that I'm just like, Ugh, it's too much love. I love the love that everyone has for each other, but again, it's too much, sometimes. 

Anthony: [00:16:46] You're ready for my love? So, for me, your best quality is the two things. So you're, first of all, your laugh is so infectious. It cracks me up whenever you laugh. When you're down here watching "Impractical Jokers”, your cackle is so stupid, and then your music. You're so good at it that like, I get jealous all the time, so I always want to try to better myself, but just to get on your level, it's so hard to get on your level with music. So yeah. That's your best quality and yeah, it kind of drives me to be better all the time.

Justine: [00:17:26] Aww thanks. I have not been able to sing or belt out as much as I used to back home. 

Anthony: [00:17:33] In the shower all the time. 

Justine: [00:17:36] Yeah. I can't do that because I have flatmates and I'm sure it would annoy the heck out of them. So I have been holding it in, unfortunately. So your best quality. Well, or two, I would say, I think you're very helpful. Even though it seems like you don't want to help sometimes, but you just go ahead and do it anyway. And then most recently, now that I know that you're really good in finances, I'm like, okay, great. You can explain everything to me if I don't understand it, you'll explain it 5 million times until I'm like, okay, that makes sense. Yeah. So I'd say those are the best qualities. 

Since we talked about the nice stuff, of course, we need to talk about the bad stuff, which I'm sure Christina, you probably have a long list for Amanda here or maybe a small one. We'll see. I don't know.  What is the most annoying thing that your sibling does? 

Christina: [00:18:25] When we were younger, every time she would, or I would actually piss her off, she had this tendency. She has really long nails and they're always kept so nice and so long and so clean. And every time I would make her mad, she would just come up to me and she would grab me by the sides of my arms. And she would stick her nails into me until like I cracked and did whatever the hell she wanted or just stopped, like annoying her. And she would just always leave like these nail marks in my arm and definitely was the worst thing ever.

 Amanda: [00:18:58] Yeah, I did. I forgot. I used to do that. 

Justine: [00:19:01] You sound proud of that by the way, Amanda.

Amanda: [00:19:03] I like getting my way.

Justine: [00:19:06] Christina, any other annoying things? 

Christina: [00:19:08] She's always stays confined to her room a lot and I wish she would come out and play more often. But other than that, she works a lot. So that's also very annoying because we always used to watch like movies have movie nights and we don't do that anymore.

 Amanda: [00:19:23] We did mention alcoholic. 

Christina: [00:19:25] Who's an alcoholic? I'm an alcoholic 

Amanda: [00:19:27] Workaholic! No workaholic. I'm not there yet. 

Justine: [00:19:36] You should like, I don't know, once a week movie night and then you can increase it.

Amanda: [00:19:41] Oh God. Where to begin. So growing up, especially the teen years, this child was, so god damn spoiled. So damn spoiled. And she got away with everything. Alright. Every little damn thing.  She was the first to what, let me see have detention get suspended from school.  She would literally not come home certain times, and no one knew where she was at. Did anything happen to her? No, not a damn thing. What did she get? She got to go to a private school, which, and that's where I wanted to go mind you. When I first started Belleville High, I hated it. I wanted private school now that they gave that to the bad one. 

Christina: [00:20:21] Because the high school didn't want me. So that is my 

Amanda: [00:20:25] Because you probably would have gotten expelled.  So growing up, I just, man, I couldn't stand this child at all.  She's gotten better, but I would still say she's kinda somewhat spoiled, she don't clean. You don't. 

Christina: [00:20:38] My room and Charlotte. 

Amanda: [00:20:41] Yeah. How about the living room where that's, the most mess? 

Christina: [00:20:46] Listen, in my defense, I cannot clean the living room because one, my father and Charlotte just destroy it the next day. It could be spotless. Immaculate. You walk in the door the next day. There's things all over the place and no one will clean it. And I stare at my dad and he's what your daughter made the mess. But yeah, he won't tell her to clean up after herself. So it's a lose.

Amanda: [00:21:05] I say her most annoying quality is just, she spoiled.

Justine: [00:21:11] Do you also think that it's because she's the youngest out of the three? 

Amanda: [00:21:15] Probably. I feel like at that point they were just like, eh, whatever. 

Justine: [00:21:19] I always feel like I always feel like the youngest is always the spoiled one. 

Anthony: [00:21:26] Yeah, I was.

Justine: [00:21:34] Thank you for admitting that. I appreciate it. 

Anthony: [00:21:37] It's the fact that I'm the only boy. 

Justine: [00:21:40] So yes, he is the, yes. 

Taylor: [00:21:42] So you had double advantage. 

Anthony: [00:21:44] Yeah, pretty much. I've grown up with women in my life, surrounded by women, mentored by women that  I get away with everything because I was the only boy. And then when I went to the Marines, it’s all men and I'm like, fuck I needed a daddy.  It put me in my place because when you get away with everything, everything done for you, yeah, women did all that all the time. But when a man tells you to do something, it's daddy's telling you to do it.  It's a different aura, I guess. I'm gonna, I'm gonna assume what you're going to say, At, is my worst quality is me being spoiled.  

Justine: [00:22:21] Honestly, I don't even remember what I was going to say about your most annoying quality, but you can share yours. And that way I can rethink about what I was supposed to say. 

Anthony: [00:22:30] Okay. So your most annoying quality, well, for me, was, you're so damn good at everything.  It's hard to stay competitive with you, especially in high school. Like what you were 16th in, the, or pretty up there. You were pretty up there. And I was like, fuck, I gotta get up there too. I want to be at least top 25. Ended up not being top 25. I was like 64th out of 364. That's the only reason why I remember it. And yeah, music, like I said before, musicality wise, so she's so much better. Pool. She fucking, I didn't know she was good at pool. She destroyed me. I couldn't believe that. I was like, when did you get good at pool? I bet you John and Jerric. Well, no, it was like, because we haven't been around each other a lot and ever since high school and then, go into the Marines. So every so often when we hang out, it's oh, let's go do something random. I was like, okay, whatever. Holy shit. She's fucking a pool shark. I couldn't believe it. Yeah, because I thought I was good at pool.  I played pool a lot when I was kid and then this one's just sinking fucking everything, but yeah, always. And then like her just being good, it just made everything so competitive. And it was just hard to keep up with her like, Oh, like our trophy room. Most of this stuff is hers, but most of this stuff is mine too, because I'm just chasing her around, trying to be just as good as her. Pretty much whatever she did, I tried to do too, like for example, volleyball. But the only reason why I played volleyball because of her, the only reason why I started singing and beatboxing  it was because of her. So a lot of things were because of you just trying to keep up with your ass. 

Justine: [00:24:02] That's bittersweet. Right. 

Anthony: [00:24:05] But it's so annoying. It's cause like just trying to keep up with you. It's so hard.

Justine: [00:24:10] Hey nobody forced you.  I guess yeah. You being spoiled was the most annoying thing because it angered me a lot that you got away with a lot of shit. And my, I had high blood pressure.  My blood was boiling when you would get away with a lot of stuff. Well, I didn't let you get away with this, but you did bring in weed into the house and you decided to smoke it with friends. And my mom was away, and I was like, nah, this is where the line is drawn. And I was ready to call the cops and turn you in. And instead, I called Tita Amy and have her talk to you and she gives you; she talks to you and I see you crying. I'm like, okay, fine, whatever. But everything else, girlfriend sleeps over. I'm not allowed to have a boyfriend sleep over for the house, but you can, I don't understand that doesn't make any sense.  You just get away with a lot of shit. And then also the fact that, you didn't do anything after high school for a good two years, and then you were forced to go into the Marines. So it's 

Anthony: [00:25:17] That was a choice. That's what I needed to do, 

Justine: [00:25:20] But yeah, I do think that you being spoiled is what's the most annoying thing for me

 Taylor: [00:25:26] So am I spoiled? Is that what's going to coming out of the tropes from the oldest, the youngest

Malori: [00:25:38] No, actually it wasn't that she was spoiled, there's a 10 year gap between me and Taylor. So growing up, I understand that she just kind of wanted to be around me and, being a teenager, that was the last thing I really wanted to do. So I mean, that was pretty much the big thing for me, but I think the thing that just kills me now is how she can hear a song one time. And knows all the frigging lyrics. We were in the car yesterday and, I was sitting there I'm like, is that what that means? Those are the lyrics of the songs I've been singing the wrong thing, like And I'm like, it's just so annoying how she can literally buy a CD and she would play it. And two hours later just coming downstairs, and she's got a whole, like first four songs memorized. And I'm just like, I don't understand how your brain works. Like in that, the mentality of being able to decipher words with music that fast and that easily has always annoyed the hell out of me.

Justine: [00:26:44] I would like to know your technique. 

Taylor: [00:26:47] It's a literal, useless, superpower. I'll put it on in the background of what I'm doing.  My brain is just downloading the music and eventually I'm like, okay, I can tell you what the words. Cause we were listening to Panic At The Disco on the radio and I was going through the lyrics and Mal's I never would have gotten that, that was the word. I was like, Oh, I'm sorry, I can't translate it into 

Anthony: [00:27:12] You have that skill too. But, well, my sister, Justine, she has that skill too. One day I was whistling in the kitchen. I was whistling, 'Good Morning, Baltimore'. Like just whistling it, no words or anything. And she's are you whistling ‘Good morning Baltimore’? I was like yeah. I'd you know, so you have that skill too. 

Justine: [00:27:30] I need to listen to it several times. I don't think I could download it with Taylor. 

Anthony: [00:27:33] You can, name it just by somebody whistling it, that's impressive too. Yeah. 

Taylor: [00:27:39] See, you got great qualities and your brother knows.

Justine: [00:27:42] I appreciate it. I do. 

Taylor: [00:27:44] I think it's when you're pissed off about something, it doesn't have to be me. But that's all we're going to be doing. For the day. And I'm like, okay, I can't get stuff accomplished. That's the biggest thing about you that pisses me off. And if something pisses her off and I'm with her and I'm trying to get stuff done or we’re grocery shopping and something pisses her off, from driving or work. I'm like, she's going to be stuck on this for the next 15 to 20 minutes and I'm just not going to engage.

Malori: [00:28:16] Very well.

Taylor: [00:28:17] I would definitely have to say it. I've had 30 years of practice. I've gotten really good at just turning off. I'm not listening to anything she has to say. I'm just going to nod. 

Justine: [00:28:26] I feel like you do that with a lot of people. 

Taylor: [00:28:28] And she's the one  that I learned it from. So I sharpened my skills at home and then I took it out to the real world.

Malori: [00:28:38] You're welcome. 

Taylor: [00:28:39] Yeah, I thank you. Thank you. Definitely helps. Especially when I'm in a situation that is just awkward. I can turn it off and be like I've. 

Anthony: [00:28:50] This is where your sarcasm comes from. It comes from anger.

Taylor: [00:28:59] I can either be depressed. I can either turn it inward and be depressed or I could just send it out to the world and just be sarcastic and just be like, I don't have to engage. 

Justine: [00:29:16] Who is the favorite child out of siblings? And why do you think that person is a favorite child? I think it's really easy because for me and my brother, that's only two people. For me, always, the youngest seems to be the favorite child. 

Anthony: [00:29:29] Yeah, but I wouldn't say it for mom, like in mom's perspective, she didn't have a favorite. When you talk about our second moms: Tita Amy and Tita San, we know. I was Tita San's favorite. You are Tita Amy's favorite. But in mom's aspect, she, I feel like she loved us both equally. There wasn't any favoritism. Yeah. One would get in trouble more, but cause you're the oldest, you have to set an example. But, I don't put that on mom as you were or you or me,  was a favorite. 

Justine: [00:29:56] I mean, I'm still going to stand by. You are the favorite child, even for mom.

Anthony: [00:30:01] You just got caught a lot. That's the problem. 

Christina: [00:30:10] I'm definitely the favorite. I gave my parents their first grandchild. So without a doubt, I am hands-down favorite.

Amanda: [00:30:21] But that doesn't make you the favorite that makes Charlotte. 

Christina: [00:30:23] Indeed. It does. No, it makes me, I produced the offspring. 

Justine: [00:30:28] So when another sibling produces another offspring, will they become the next favorite? 

Christina: [00:30:34] Actually, my brother is indeed pregnant with his girlfriend. No, I'm still the favorite that I gave them their first. 

Amanda: [00:30:38] First granddaughter, hold on to that boy. 

Christina: [00:30:44] If it's a boy, it still doesn't matter. Charlotte will always be the favorite. You cannot top Charlotte. My daughter is honestly the most phenomenal human being in the world. She is so funny. She's so sassy. You can have a conversation with her about anything and everything, and she'll hold onto that conversation and take it with any direction you go in I mean, I could have brought her in. Yeah, I know. I sent her next door.

Taylor: [00:31:10] Okay. I will say that confidence was amazing. When we were over last time visiting at your house and 

Christina: [00:31:16] Oh yeah, she went outside, and she was painting with you guys.

Taylor: [00:31:18] I don't think there is a favorite with me and Mal, what do you think? 

Malori: [00:31:22] Oh yeah, I was gonna say the same thing 

Taylor: [00:31:23] There's no favorites, but I do think that within our greater family, Malori, you are the favorite. 

Malori: [00:31:28] Okay.

Taylor: [00:31:29] You're the life of the party. That's a difference.

Justine: [00:31:37] Taylor, even as your friend, we're always like, is Mal going to be there?

Malori: [00:31:44] Because I'm four years old. That's what it is. Taylor's the serious one. Just I think for me, when it comes down to just being outside with you, having a good time is because of, look I deal with on a regular basis that everything is just so serious. I don't want to have a care in the world. I don't want to be an adult. And that's pretty much how I've lived my life.

Christina: [00:32:06] So Amanda, do you have a favorite? Thank you. Thank you.   

Amanda: [00:32:17] There was necessarily favorites. I feel like we kind of were all, there were different aspects that they preferred for each of us.  I would say for me, I did not give them any problems. So for the most part, they didn't have to worry about me. And for Junior, I'd say same thing, but at the same time, he was also the first. So everything. We did it didn't really matter cause he already did it. So for you again, you were just spoiled. That's all. 

Christina: [00:32:42] That's all right. I'll take it as long as I'm the favorite.

Justine: [00:32:49] So in previous episodes we talked about our own family dynamics, but we haven't really talked about relationships with our siblings. So how would you describe your relationship with your sibling?

Malori: [00:33:00] I guess I'll go for it, but I think it's pretty good, we can get on each other's nerves, still will sit around and, laugh and talk and catch up with everything. I mean, hey, she had four siblings to choose from and she picked me so 

Taylor: [00:33:15] Three other siblings. 

Malori: [00:33:18] See, this is what I have to deal with on regular basis. People you saw it.

Taylor: [00:33:22] I'm just doing the math. If I was choosing from my four other siblings, I'd have five siblings and we'd be six people, right? 

Anthony: [00:33:29] Nobody asks for a math lesson.

Malori: [00:33:34] And now you understand why I'm the non-adult in this. Because she's always the one correcting me. Thank you everybody.

 Taylor: [00:33:46] We are much better now that I'm an adult, I think.  When she didn't have to be the adult anymore, our relationship got a lot better. I will say growing up, there was a time where I was like I want to hang out with her, but she wants to hang out with everybody, but me and I'm feeling a sort of way about that. But then I became like 17, 18, and then she finally wanted to, be my friend and I think that's what it was. We had to get to an age where we could be friends with each other. And it took a long time and it took a lot of fighting, like tons of it, but we've grown past it. 

Amanda: [00:34:22] That's pretty similar to I guess me and my sister. 

Christina: [00:34:24] I was just gonna say, yeah. 

Amanda: [00:34:25] Cause our teen years, man, they were bad. I feel like every conversation we had ended with a fight cause you were disrespectful and couldn't take any type of criticism. And plus, we shared a room. Which was just the worst because, I wanted to stay up reading. She was like, no, turn off that light. And it got to a point where we like split the business. I don't know where this is. Your side. Don't go. I won't cross over. We had to split the closets. And of course, because we shared a room, she could take my shit and she took it all the damn time and she never gave it back. Or if she did give it back, it wasn't in the same condition. And so when we finally got our separate rooms, I think I was like in senior year of high school at that point, it was the point where, I just don't want to deal with her. I hide in my room and not have to deal with her now. It got better by the time she started working at Hooters. I want to say. Cause then that's when you started to get your shit together. I think, and so I say we are so much better now than then. 

Christina: [00:35:15] Definitely. For sure. We fought a lot. And honestly, I think it was more like my middle school years that really kind of pushed everyone in the household over the edge with my behavior. And honestly, going to therapy was the best thing that ever happened to me. So that definitely, I think improved like the whole, my whole dynamic with everyone in the family. I was able to just speak on my mind more on express myself in a better way than just like some yelling and fighting with everyone. And becoming friends with like friend of my really good friends. She definitely helped me grow into the person I liked. My family likes her. My mom would always kind of go to her on the side Hey, Christina's doing X, Y, and Z, help out a little bit. Yeah. So definitely as I got older, our communication has been a lot better. I could kind of talk to her about anything and everything. And although she does still judge me, there's always like some love behind the judgment.

 Anthony: [00:36:11] So go, what is our family dynamic? 

Justine: [00:36:13] Oh, so just, I guess a recap from what I've shared in previous episodes is that we're just not a really close family in general. There's no. Very hierarchical. And you just don't show any type of affection whatsoever and it's just, you do what you need to do kind of thing. So that's the family dynamic. 

Anthony: [00:36:33] Yeah. I think from well, what it is like a little background, I'm like pretty much from high school to like now, well, before mom died, we pretty much didn't talk to each other. It was like if, when we lived in the same house with mom, it was, my sister had her room and I was in my room. We shared a bathroom, that's it. We didn't talk at all. Like for a good seven years, we didn't talk.  I know that tore my mom part because like my cousins would tell us that all the time. But now since mom passed away. I know in her mind, she always wanted us to talk and be close because she grew up with a lot of siblings. So they were always close, but now it's now we're like, we're pretty much, I feel like we're not there yet to have a brother, sister relationship, like what you guys have. It's more of like a partnership of this is because, like she said, you pretty much know what you have to do and you fucking do it. Cause you know, we don't really, I tried to hug you motherfucker and you didn't want to hug me back. 

Justine: [00:37:29] I'm not a hugger.  Everybody knows. Everyone knows I'm not a hugger back me up guys.

Anthony: [00:37:43] It was like, mom just passed away. We're doing all her final expenses and shit. And I just need a fucking hug, but yeah, Renee took a picture of me just hugging you. And yeah, I ended that picture like. Yeah, I hold that. I hold that picture close to my heart 

Justine: [00:37:59] Because I'm not hugging you, 

Anthony: [00:38:02] But it's really funny.

Justine: [00:38:03] I was just going to agree with you. I, we don't talk, we don't have that close relationship. Actually, Taylor always makes fun or jokes around and says that she knows more about you than I know more about you. Completely agree on that aspect. And I think it's also because since our parents got divorced, when I was 13, I was like, okay, I need to be independent because we need to help mom in however way we can. So just being more independent and not really thinking you need a role model or somebody to lead you. It was just more of everyone’s for themselves and, you just move on and you don't show the rest of the world that something's wrong in your life. And then on top of all of your spoiled-ness, I was really pissed off about it. So I did try to cut you off majority of the time, because I did want you to grow up and mature, but it wasn't the best way to most likely do that. But yeah. And then of course with mom passing away, then we're just somewhat closer because we do have, we talk on the business, what I say, we need to do business and stuff like that to get some things done. But from time to time and we'll just, hop in here and there and say, how are you doing even though I still find it awkward when you do say to me. Because, most of the times when I reach out to the family, I'm always business there's yeah. It's always something. Yeah. And so I remember one time I just called Tita Amy and she's yeah, what do you want? I'm like, I just want to say hello.  I'm actually trying. Good to know that you just want to know what I want, but I don't want anything. So that's something that, that I think I need to get used to as well. 

Anthony: [00:39:42] Oh. So just to put it in into perspective, this was the first picture we've had together in like years. See the no, no love, no affection. See that? Yup.  I think that, yeah. That was the first picture we've had together in; I don't know how long. 

Justine: [00:40:01] Yeah, because I think the last one is I'm just thinking about is DC when 

Anthony: [00:40:06] You and mom and, Renee. Yeah. 

Justine: [00:40:14] So Amanda and Taylor how does your culture define your sibling relationship?

Amanda: [00:40:20] So Puerto Rican culture, well, Hispanic culture in general family is paramount. It's like the core of everything. When you have siblings, actually many in Puerto Rico have multiple siblings. Like my dad's one of 12 and my mom's, I think one of 

Christina: [00:40:35] A million 

Amanda: [00:40:35] Eight.  Growing up, we were always told, that's your sister, you have, you can't treat her that way. That's your brother. I never said that about my brother, cause we never had issues with our brother, but it was always stressed that, that's your sister, you can't treat her that way. You love each other, you blah, blah, blah. 

Christina: [00:40:52] And your family has everything.

Amanda: [00:40:55] Yeah.   When we were younger, I was always like, yeah, she's my sister. And I love her, but it doesn't mean I have to like her. Saying something like that to family would have been like, Oh my God, blasphemy. And so yeah, I'd definitely say in Hispanic culture, you can't really say you don't like family it's. Not the way to go. 

Christina: [00:41:18] I think we definitely are different though, because we have a lot of our family, speaking on what, like you Justine and Anthony.  We're not like an affectionate bunch like me, and my sister don't hug.  Our parents, the only time I hugged my mom was when before she got her surgery, that's the only time we really hug, if something like that occurs, even tell you the last time, but I don't think we've ever hugged, honestly. Like I, I'm not a hugger in general. I feel like it's like hugging is really weird. I just, I think it's awkward. I never know where to place my hands. You play some this way. Like how do you go? 

Justine: [00:41:51] Oh gosh the hug, I feel it's the most stressful thing to think about. 

Christina: [00:41:57] Yeah. And honestly, my mom's side of the family, our cousin Cathy,  she's super affectionate. She comes and she grabs you and gives you the biggest hug. And it's your kind of just dangling there. Yeah.  Our family is very big on affection but I guess our side really isn't. Yeah. Our immediate isn't. Our family is definitely, I mean, shit. We have our grandma that lives next door with our aunt upstairs, from hers, our uncle, like my brother, my dad's siblings. And then on the other side, we have another, his other brother and our family has always been very tight, kept at least more with my dad's side than my mom's side, but we definitely see them a lot. We've talked to them a lot.  We're all very close. For sure. 

Malori: [00:42:44] Our family on our maternal grandmother's side, especially like everybody's very family oriented, very huggy. It's like the minute you go, it's everybody's lining up to give you a hug, give me a kiss. And I mean, even here in this house, like the big thing that has really kind of affected us with this whole quarantine is that we haven't been able to hug and kiss each other. It's that basic human touch that you don't realize how important it is. And so you can't do it anymore. And like my grandmother, anytime we would go to some family function, everybody knew, Oh, it's Aunt Freda. And they would just like line up for hugs and kisses because they knew that she gave out the best hugs and kisses and lines would form for this woman, just so that everybody could get one. And in the house, growing up, it was always the hug and the kiss. When you got up in the morning, before you left the house, when you went to bed at night, when he came in from school, there was always that type of feeling, very family centered. In our house when it comes to the dynamics, everybody had an equal voice, no matter how old you were, you could be three years old. And when you sat at that table for dinner, you spoke, everybody listened. In other parts of the family, we can see where people have been like, I'm the oldest you need to listen to me. For us, our core, it's always been, you live here, you have an equal voice, so it's always kinda been a democracy in the house. No matter who's been in there. Did I miss anything? 

Taylor: [00:44:19] What's the actual cultural aspect to that? 

Malori: [00:44:23] You can take that as black people. Oh yeah.

Taylor: [00:44:29] I guess as the cultural dynamic within the black community, because of the whole, with, within the African American aspect with, because of the whole like post-slavery and diaspora part of it, family is huge. it is a huge thing, but there are also like caveats to that. In what expectations you're supposed to have. I think I ended up talking in a circle about this, but you have your very matriarchal households would then outside, you also have your patrilineal, but in us, we had equal amounts of it because at one point our grandfather was still alive. So he was the head of the house. But then once he passed away and my uncle moved out, we became a very matrilineal household because it's all women and it's not so much a I'm the head of the household thing.  Mal said, we just try to be as equal as possible. But with our aunt, we, because we respect her and she's the elder of the house. We give her that and saying, okay, we're going to listen to what your decision is. We trust you to make that a decision on our behalf. So yeah, there's no real, like older, younger thing I do. Malori has these moments where she's I'm your elder, you need to respect me, but it's never a serious moment where we have to do that.

Malori: [00:45:51] Even if I was serious, you wouldn't take it seriously.

Taylor: [00:45:53] I wouldn't.

Justine: [00:45:55] Why wouldn't you take it seriously? 

Taylor: [00:45:56] You've seen some of these moments where Malori is you need to not talk to me. Like I'm a child. My response is always you need to not act like one. 

Justine: [00:46:05] That is true. 

Malori: [00:46:08] Wow. 

Justine: [00:46:09] I've been there. I'm just saying that it's true that I've been there, and I've seen it.

Taylor: [00:46:16] Yeah, no, she knows. At the end of the day, I've got her back. Because she's got mine. 

Malori: [00:46:20] Of course. 

Taylor: [00:46:21] We're the sappy sisters. We really are. 

Justine: [00:46:23] So your relationship was crafted by the influence of your family or, and her parents.  

Amanda: [00:46:30] My sister partially answered that already. In the earlier question, basically saying, my family, my parents were never very that overly affectionate with each other. So in the sense that spread out to us we're not overly affectionate with each other now, I'd say that about, it, I mean, outside of our immediate family, people, at least on my mom's side, hella affectionate, to the point, where it's kinda annoying. I'd say my dad's side is more reflective. It's more reflective of our immediate family. And yeah. I'd say that's probably why maybe my siblings and I are the way we are? Why we won't always talk constantly and we're not, I don't think we're that close. It's still that underlying the niggling back in your mind, anything goes down, they got my back a hundred percent 

Christina: [00:47:12] Facts.

Malori: [00:47:12] Bounce off of that. Going back and looking through our family in the house when it was my mother was alive, my uncle and my aunt were still in your Taylor probably wouldn't remember that much because she was only a year old when her mother died. But the dynamics between the three of them that I was able to see. It was the same thing.  They may disagree. They may argue, but they still had each other's backs. And if you take it back a generation farther with my grandmother and her seven siblings. The dynamics between each one and every one of the siblings was different. So I think if we were, and I think we really did base our relationship and her cousin, Mike and his brothers that we really consider our brothers too at this point. And we based our relationship with them almost how our grandmother based her relationship with their father, her brother, they were literally two peas in a pod. They were getting in trouble together. They were always either coming up to our house every weekend or we were going down to their house every weekend. So he always saw them. They always saw that interaction, how they had such a good time. And, I think for me, I can't speak for Taylor, but I know that. That's the type of relationship that I wanted to Taylor was the one that, my grandmother had with her brother just seeing the laughter and the way that they would tell stories and all the stuff that they can get into together and just laugh about it. And I think that is really, for me, at least has formed the way that I wanted to take on the relationship with Taylor and how I've tried to keep it that way.

Justine: [00:48:48] That's really nice.

 Taylor: [00:48:49] Works for me. I, yeah, I did model a lot, I think more so on our, my, our grandmother and her brother, more so than. Our, my, our parents, our mom’s mom and her siblings, more so than their relationship, because growing up, I saw less of it because by the time I was like nine, my uncle had moved out of the house. But I not for nothing, I really can't remember a lot of. My aunt and my uncle they're interactions because he worked, he worked a lot, we'd see him at dinner and everything, but I can't remember much of their sibling relationship growing up. Now I see it more as an adult because like they call each other and they're talking to each other all the time, but he was at that point, he was off doing his own thing. So I didn't really see a lot. But yeah, so my grandmother and her brother were the bigger influence in my that's the type of family relationship I want to have with my siblings. Not even Mal, just like all four of us, but at the same time, I'm aware that we're all at very different parts of our lives because of the age gaps. So I do also see in my relationship with my other siblings, like my grandmother, because they were, my grandmother's siblings were born 14 or 16 year age difference. It was every two years until the two sides of our grandmother. And there were eight of them. So I don't want to say it was. I think 16-year age gap from the youngest to the oldest, I may be wrong. So I can see in the relationship they had versus my five siblings. I can see mirrors at like differences and mirrors to that, and that you're at different stages of your life. You have to be respectful of that and understand that you may want something, but that's not exactly what's going to happen because people have to have lives. You can't that element you can't get around.

Anthony: [00:50:51] I don't think it was my family, our families that crafted our relationship because we really didn't have that much family here.  Cause we didn't really hang out with our family that much. Right? 

Justine: [00:51:03] We didn't have a lot of our first cousins in the US it was a lot of the extended family that we had and we hung out with here.

Anthony: [00:51:13] Yeah. And then most of my cultural development was with one of my ex-girlfriends cause she was Filipino. So with her, it was more that control aspect. With here it's with our immediate family, it wasn't. I guess it's more American that we don’t care about each other or hang out with each other.

Justine: [00:51:39] Thinking about your relationship throughout your life, to now, how would you want your relationship to change? Who would like to share first?

Anthony: [00:51:48] Fine. I'll go first. Cause we had a shitty relationship before. Like we honestly didn't like each other. We were just roommates. So now we’re gonna, be better.  Brother and sister relationship. I'm going to contact you every so often. Actually, there was a one time I just messaged you on Facebook and what do you want? You were like, what do you want? I just want to say hi jerk. Yes. 

Justine: [00:52:14] That was the beginnings of yeah, you don't normally do that. So yes. I'm going to think you're going to need or want something because that's how, again, our family was like, you only contacted them if you needed something.

Anthony: [00:52:28] Well, now it's just going to be, more emotional support and just talking. Cause I get lonely sometimes when Renee leaves. I am independent. I live in my RV by myself. Sometimes I go down to Florida for. 

Justine: [00:52:44] Okay. Okay. That's fine. JJ goes with you too, but I understand like you can feel lonely and yes, I will be there as a support system if you need it. 

Anthony: [00:52:54] Ya better.  In the memory of our mother, we need to be closer like how she used to call her sister and Lola all the time. We need to talk at least once a week and update me about your life. Cause Taylor knows more about me than you. 

Justine: [00:53:12] She does. She does. Yeah, kind of what Christina was also mentioning for us. I know throughout our life we had a lot of aunts and uncles who would say, it's only just you two, so don't fight get along in that because, once your parents are gone, it's just you two. So in that aspect, I understand that better. And I am going to try to make the effort to, be a better sibling, but I don't think it can be on the level of Taylor and Malori, which is really close. For me from an external person or another perspective, like they have a really close relationship. But as long as there are times when I just legit did not want to even look at you or talk to you. And this, now I can talk to you and look at you and I think it's just baby steps. 

Anthony: [00:54:04] Yep. Yeah, that would just give and take some time.

Taylor: [00:54:08] I kind of want to piggyback off of that one. I think the difference, I think you and A are going to get there because a lot of work in separated from the way our grandmother was and everything, but Mal and I had, we lost our mother when I was one. So that, that starts a whole dynamic there in you have to appreciate things because they can be gone like that. Cause she wasn't even sick for a long time. It was something that came up and within a day she was gone. So that whole unpredictability of life thing we've really. Like it's the, you don't know how you're and react to something until it happens. And then you're forced to do things based upon the ripple effect of that reaction. So we have always been taught you can't take things for granted that way. And that I think that you guys will, to a point where you are a lot closer than you are. That's just my opinion. 

Anthony: [00:55:12] I think what it is our mindset now is the only way we can talk to our mother is through each other because we're a part of her. So I have to see that in you At mom's there in you. And I'm going to hug you more so I can hug her. Cause I miss her so much, Yeah.  

Malori: [00:55:37] Coming from like Taylor was young. So she didn't really get to have to experience that loss until she realized later on in life. You guys are going through that now, which is what I had to go through. The thing that will hold you up is each other. You are each other's backbone now. You're going to be like everybody else who you're going to have moments where you can't stand each other. But the thing is you have to remember that you can rely on one another, that if you pick up a phone and say, I need, before you even finish the sentence, they're saying I've got you. And it will get to that point, unfortunately you had to learn it through the loss. But it gets a lot easier. And I can tell you from my experience, there are going to be so many good times that the two of you are going to have with each other, that you're going to look back on this moment on this podcast. You're gonna listen to it, 10, 15 years from now, and then be like, Oh my gosh, do you remember when we did this? And we had so much fun and this really kind of started everything for us. And you can sit there and whether it's via zoom, Skype, whatever, if you're sitting on a couch next to each other, having a glass of wine or watching a movie or singing ‘Phantom of the Opera’, you’re going to have that. And this is this is your day one, and each day is just going to get better and better and better. And why, because you both want that. So take that and, just remember your mom's watching and she's going to push you guys together. And even when you guys want to pull yourselves apart, because you're feeling like Ugh, for each other, she's going to be there to remind you. You love each other. You got each other, you got to take care of each other and that's the whole mindset that you just have to remember. And when you remind yourself that every day, and it'll be so much better.  All right. 

Justine: [00:57:36] Thanks Mal. 

Anthony: [00:57:39] Yeah, they go virtual hug with me. 

Taylor: [00:57:46] I want our relationship to keep evolving as we get older. I think that's what it is. I like, I don't want it to change. I just want it to evolve to like the next level, like if we were Pokemon, I think we're like, second out of four stages in our relationship. Now that we've gotten out of the big sister little sister thing, now we're friends. And then I guess next we need to start pushing each other. I think that's our next level where we've got to be like, okay, we gotta do this and you gotta do that. 

 Malori: [00:58:17] I'm all for that. I agree wholeheartedly. I mean, Taylor's already got plans for us. When, we hit milestone birthdays. We're going to do a "Grace and Frankie" and be doing pod in the middle of the desert somewhere, but yeah, I go to conferences and, at the end of the conference, Taylor's coming out to hang out with me and, do stuff. And I just liked that, that's. That's the fun aspect and, wherever our lives lead us, I know that we're always going to make sure that we have at least a chunk of time where we are with each other, it's kind of moving everything out the way, no job, no relationships, whatever it is and saying, okay, this is the sister time and you don't want to do this, and I think that. Really a big way that you, like you said, move to that next level where you involve it even more and just continue to have fun. And I mean, this has been a wild hell of a ride. Yeah. It's been great. 

Taylor: [00:59:13] I think you're cool too.

Amanda: [00:59:19] Yes, that's now mine and my sister started, ah, crap. 

Christina: [00:59:23] I feel like my sister and I are kind of, we can definitely still grow more, but I feel like over these past two years, we have definitely grown a lot closer and taken on a whole lot more responsibility in the sense of when our mom had breast cancer and then our dad getting, let go from his job, we both had to acclimate and  just adjust to this whole alright. Like I'm going to go food shopping this week. You go food shopping next week. We've definitely became team over these past two years and have definitely grown together to just keep the family afloat as much as we can.  I'd say individually for myself and her, like maybe, yeah, we could hang out a little more, but we both do have completely separate lives. She's constantly working. And then me being a parent, I go to work and then I come home and then it's just like mom duties. And maybe I would maybe like, maybe once a month we could do like a sister's day. Let's hang out in your room. I'll come downstairs.

Amanda: [01:00:24] It's funny. You mentioned that I've been thinking a lot about this. Never mentioned it to anyone, but I've been thinking. of asking you to teach me to drive.

Christina: [01:00:40] Honestly, I would totally do it. I'm not the best example for a driver. Cars 

Amanda: [01:00:44] But you wouldn't judge me, which I feel like everybody in this house would judge me. 

Christina: [01:00:48] Oh yeah. Especially my father don't ever get into a car with that, man. Like nothing in the car. Is like perfect either. I'm going too slow. I'm going too fast. Why did it not go past the yellow light? Hello, everyone knows they're supposed to slow down, but in his eyes, you're supposed to keep going drive a little faster. I mean, I could definitely help you out with that for sure. Maybe when all the snow is gone, because yeah. We could make that a monthly thing once a day, once a month. Just like for a few hours go out in the world and drive. 

Amanda: [01:01:21] Yeah, we could do that. I also think we need to bring our brother into this a bit more because I feel like we well not, he did it himself to be perfectly honest, he cut himself out. But yeah, I feel like we definitely need to. 

Christina: [01:01:35] Once he has the baby, he'll definitely be more involved because he's going to experience that coping parent. And he's going to want to be more involved with us and bring the baby over a lot. So I think. Once the baby's born, his mindset will change in the sense that like the same way mine did, once I had Charlotte, I was like, wow, family is a big, important role. And it is awesome to be able to know that if in the event I'm ever struggling, I could always turn to you or my brother, or if I need someone to watch her, I could just say, Hey Listen, I just need like a mental moment to myself. Can someone just please, and I just know that the answer will always be yes, regardless of whatever anyone's doing.  You guys just drop things and you guys will be able to willing to help out. And I think once he realizes like being a parent, he’ll kind of start to say, Hey, I’m stressed out.  Maybe I should go over more often because they will take the baby. And hopefully, I mean, it's debatable, but. That's what I'm hoping will happen. Yeah. 

Justine: [01:02:37] Well, thanks everyone for sharing. It was really great to hear your favorite stories and work and everything and qualities and all of that. And of course, reflecting on all of this. So I really appreciate it, or we really appreciate it. Sorry. Amanda, Taylor and I also really appreciate it. And even though we have. Such a very different relationships with our siblings. I think, the underlying, lesson or that I can hear from everyone's stories is that we all love our siblings and, we'd do anything for them as well, even though we don't necessarily share it in affection and in hugs and stuff like that. But at least, we all. Care about our siblings that much, that again, we would do anything for them. 

 Taylor: [01:03:26] Thanks for listening to United AF with us and our special guests siblings. 

Amanda: [01:03:30] If you enjoyed today's episode, please like comment and share a conversation with your friends and family on our social media pages.

Justine: [01:03:37] Join us next time as we talk about mental health. 

Taylor: [01:03:39] Cause sometimes we really do need to talk about mental health because this is the time where we need it.